The Reflection

Visa - Made it this time around

2006-06-02T13:43:00.000-07:00

It was a bit of an anti-climax. My visa interview did not last more than 2 minutes. After having gotten a big blow with my last attempt at the F1 (No, this is not the same thing where there are zooming cars on race tracks), I was expecting at least a soft punch. But it turned out to be a peck on the cheek.

Although the interview bit was a breeze, my whole experience with US visa consulate at Chennai was very bitter. I had an 11 Am appointment and the appointment letter very clearly stated not to arrive earlier than 15 minutes of the appointment time. So I arrive at 10:45am to find a queue that's as long as I could see. And I had to join at the very end. No special privelege for following instructions (Urghhh...). It wasn't until 1am that I could step into the premises of the consulate. They made me stand for almost 2.5 hours before they let me in their gates. I was literally baked in the heat. For people familiar with Chennai summer, it needs no further explanation.

I can't believe the US consulate makes everyone stand for over 2 hours on the road without even a shelter. This kind of treatment is ridiculous. The heat was unbearable, just imagine if the rain gods decide to shed some of their load. Simply ridiculous, nothing more to add.

As for the interview, it went something like this

VO: Hello. How are you doing today.
Me: Very well thank you. How about you.
VO: Good. Thank you.
VO: So which school are you going to
Me: Dartmouth College
VO: Which program are you going to do at Dartmouth
Me: The MBA program at the Tuck School of Business
VO: Looks at my id card and asks how long have you been working with ...?
Me: Three and a half years
VO: Where were you born?
Me: ....
VO: When did you come back to India?
Me: ...
VO: How old were you when you came back to India?
Me: ...
VO: Sir, your visa is approved. You would receive your passport in three business days. Good luck with your program at your future goals.
Me: Thank you.
VO: You have a good day.
Me: You too.

The power of resignation

2006-04-02T13:35:00.000-07:00

I plan to submit my resignation at my office next week. For some strange reason it feels so good and powerful. It feels like I'm taking control of my destiny rather than letting things take charge of how my life goes.

It is only at certain points in your life that you conciously make a big decision when you have several choices. I think it's one of those stand out moments for me where I am making this big move to quit and go back to school. It may not be a very uncommon thing if you look at it. But it still doesn't make it any smaller for me.

How this decision turns out is for time to decide. But at the moment I feel really good that I'm doing this.

The decision has been made....or has it?

2006-02-28T12:23:00.000-08:00

One big thing that happened this month is the decision of which business school to go to. Having got offers from INSEAD and Tuck, it was time for some tough decisions. The two being very different schools with clear differentiators of strength and weaknesses, one would assume it would be an easy decision based on priority.

US vs Europe
Two year vs One year

These are big differences unlike say Chicago vs Columbia would have been. But in the end it proved really hard. I loved INSEAD for certain reasons and loved Tuck for altogether different reasons. It was in a way choosing between your two babies. It was very hard to let go off one.

In the end Tuck won over. My heart always had a soft corner for Tuck for its culture and people. And the top class program and placements let my mind reason why Tuck is the best choice. So heart and mind together edged Tuck ahead of INSEAD.

So Tuck, here I come. But wait, I can't forget that I'm still waitlisted at Stanford. There is still a tiny-winy chance (or more) that I could get into Stan. Well, that would make the decision very easy. But oh well, I won't know until May.

Anyway I guess I can afford to say...'Tuck, here I come'.

My Vacation

2006-02-28T12:14:00.000-08:00

I had a wonderful month of February. I was on vacation the entire month. Coming back to India after a year is really fantastic. And the fact that I'm going to be here for a while makes it even better, totally eliminating that "urghh" feeling that usually happens in the end of your vacation.

There were a few things that didn't work out as planned during this month. But overall its been great. I'm so glad that I packed my bags and decided to come here to spend a good six months. I'm glad that I didn't listen to some friends (who meant well but) who reasoned that it made sense to stay in the US longer.

The highlight of the vacation was of course the trip to Goa with the entire family. It was a laidback relaxed kind of a trip, very different from some of the cover-it-all trips that I've made in the States. One whole week of sand and sunshine was wonderful coming from the ice desert of Minneapolis.

There are lots of things that I have in mind for the coming months. I just hope that I move ass and really do all those things.

Back to work in mera bharat mahan

2006-02-28T12:08:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow I start work again in India after more than two years of working in the US. People tell me that it's going to be super hard to adjust and that everyone who comes back hates it. I'll find all that out tomorrow.

I really doubt that I'm going to hate it. Part of the reason is that I'm going to be working for not more than three to four months more. So not too much time to really hate it. I have decided to enjoy whatever little time I have left in TCS. Coz really TCS has been very good to me and I thoroughly enjoyed the journey.

Music Piracy

2006-01-12T13:20:00.000-08:00

This is one of those topics that I don't know where I stand. I had a discussion with one of my colleagues on this topic and I found it really hard to take a stand.

It definitely seems unethical and incorrect to download mp3's online and share them with the whole world. But since it's such a ubiquitous thing that it doesn't feel you're doing wrong. Mp3's are a very close part of our generation. Everyone wants to have the latest songs downloaded from the internet. And the talk of paying for a download. Who does that?

I feel that music piracy is like corruption in India. Everyone knows that it is wrong but continue to be a part of it. Why? Because everyone does it.

Viva Las Vegas...

2006-01-05T18:49:00.000-08:00

I really don't know how I would describe Vegas. I have to say that I had a good time in the trip. And the pleasant weather in the Christmas weekend just added to the experience.

The trip was pretty much a last minute decision. It was more the drag of Minneapolis that made me go than the lure of the tingling coins in the slot machines.

It's hard to not get amazed by the different hotels, casinos and the glitter of the town. But at the same time I can't believe that woman is a commodity in this town. Half the money is made by selling women. A country that ridicules other lesser countries due to lack of women's rights and sexual discrimination, has to look at its own self.

The drive to the Grand Canyon was quite nice. The Grand Canyon is definitely an experience. But we had too little time here. We could not even hike far enough down. So we just ended up clicking some nice pictures and checking out the best views before we hit the road again. Having stayed in the rockies for a year, I've come to appreciate mountains very much. The canyons were not very different from the mountains. Just that they go below the ground. Its just this huge whole in the ground in the middle of nowhere.

On the whole, Vegas+Canyon is definitely an experience that you want to go through, although not my favorite places on Earth.

Mama, I'm coming home....

2006-01-05T18:35:00.000-08:00

After two years in the "land of the free", I'm going to go back home for a good long time. I hope to spend a good half year with family and friends before I get into the rigor of the MBA. I'm so looking forward to this.

My inner-self tells me that this is an opportunity of a life-time. There may never be a chance again when I can genuinely take a break from the routines that this life brings. And do the things that I have always wanted to do. Cater to the me who rarely gets to do what he wants to.

I want to read this post at the end of the six months and look back with satisfaction that I made full use of the time that I had. Insha Allah.

Few-kwa

2005-12-16T19:00:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I got a mail from Fuqua that my admissions decision is now available online and that I can view it after logging on to their website. Well, they were not really right when they said that. It's not really a decision. More like indecision.

"As a result of the tremendous competition for the Class of 2008, we are unable to offer you a final decision at this time. Your application has been placed on our waitlist."

The moment I opened the window, I visualy searched for the word 'Congratulations'. In a second I realized that I was not admitted. I was a little dissapointed and bit surprised as well. I thought that getting into Fuqua shouldn't be very hard. I felt that my best chance was at Fuqua and since Tuck had already admitted me, thought it was natural for Fuqua to admit me. Looks like I was wrong.

Anyway since Tuck is definitely my choice ahead of Fuqua, it doesn't matter so much (...I guess.) It would have been nice to say that I was admitted X, Y and Z and I chose X. I guess just some ego massage.

But what the hell, I was not rejected anyway. I better learn to thank what I've got.

Now, there is no sign of MIT Sloan. I'm not giving up on it. But at least I stopped hoping that today would be the day that I get the Sloan interview invite. If they like me they'll invite me. Anyway my first love Tuck is by my side in any case. I love you Tuck.

The Admission packet

2005-12-14T13:44:00.000-08:00

Well.. I am so used to dealing everything online that I totally forgot that school's send out an official letter of admittance to the admitted students. It was really exciting to go through it. I think I read every bit of whatever they sent out other than the Hopkins Center of Art magazine (...wonder why they sent that).

I was especially fascinated with the envelope in which they sent the letter. It was this transparent paper with tiny winy color confitti kinda things on it. And the coolest thing was that my name was printed on that envelope. Such things make you feel special.

It also had a CD of a music album made by the Tuck Band. Man....they're good. I'm a feeling a bit intimidated by the talents of these Tuckies. Wonder where I stand relative to my future classmates.

Happiness

2005-12-14T12:00:00.000-08:00

What is Happiness.

Happiness like love cannot be defined. How do I know whether I am happy or not.

Question: If I have a lot of money, am I happy?
Answer: Maybe. But money is not happiness

Question: If I'm around my loved one. Am I happy?
Answer: Maybe. But supposing I have no money, struggling to make ends meet and deep in debt, how can I be happy.

Question: If I enjoy what I do for a living. Am I happy?
Answer: Maybe. But you never seem to enjoy something for too long.

I think it's very rare that anyone ever feels that they are happy and content in life for a period of time. We always want that something more, that we don't have today, to be happy. Once you have that, you want something more. Something that you can't have.

So can we ever be happy this way? We are always in the path to reach happiness and never reach it.

Man behind the mask

2005-12-14T10:29:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I feel each one of us have multiple personalities. We put on different masks at different times with different people. Sometimes you are the funny guy, sometimes the thinker and other times a complete introvert.

There would be a bunch of people who can swear that I'm the most carefree person more interested in chilling out than doing something contructive. Others who firmly believe that I hardly have any fun and like to stay by myself.

Why is it that such contradicting opinions of the same person are held by different people??

So then what defines this man. Does he have an identity of his own that he can call his?

Whose life is he living?

It's party time...

2005-12-11T03:13:00.000-08:00

Its 5:00 am on a sunday morning and I am sitting in my brightly lit office cubicle sipping on a 500 calorie cup of chocolate milk. If this was a week before, my reaction might've been.....Man like sucks!!

But now life rocks!! I got admitted to Dartmouth Tuck School of Business MBA program. Woooohooooo!!!

After one year of prolonged effort, this feels like it is worth every minute of the effort. I haven't been so excited in a long time. I have this new born freedom in me to enjoy myself. Do things that I haven't done in years. I have this urge to quit my job in the next couple of months and just do all those things that I missed out on.

Just spoke to one of my friends and we are planning on a road trip in North India some time soon. Man that sounds like fun. I'm actually hoping that we can go to some non-touristy places like the Tiger reserves and perhaps also the North East. Well it needs a lot of planning.

For now it's time to party......